July 21, 2005

Boys don't cry

There is something wrong with the world today. A lot of tragedies happen everyday, around the world, houses burn down, bombs explode, train collide, cars crash, it's all in the news everyday. People learn to live with it, and when you come out on the streets, you can still find people laughing, working, going about their daily routines. I don't know if these are my unlucky days, or I just opened my eyes, but I have seen four people crying in a week, not in their homes, hidden from the world, but outside, on the streets. It gives me an eerie feeling, make me wonder if it a is
sign for something else.

As I left for office a few days back, I picked up my stuff, and walked up to the railway station as I always do. The train was due in five minutes, so I lit up a cigarette. It was then that I noticed that there was a small kid standing there, looking at his mother, holding her hand, and watching her weep. I could just see tears trickle down her face, just crying quietly, on that bench. Soon the train came, and I left with the crowd, leaving them sitting on the bench.

The next one was yesterday while I was on my way from the station to the office. It is just a five minutes walk, and people are always rushing there, it's just something about the place. As I was walking by a tall building, I noticed a woman standing in a corner, with a cigarette in her hand, and tears flowing out of her eyes. Why I don't know, I didn't care to ask, I just rushed like everybody else to where I had to go.

After an easy morning in the office today, I finally left for lunch. Picked up some Chinese from the food court and started looking for a place to sit down. I found one right in the corner, below the televisions, sat down and started eating. There was a man sitting on the next table, tall white man, holding a cellphone to his ears, whispering into it. Then I heard him say, softly, don't do this to me. It did sound like he was breaking up or something, but he couldn't be crying in a food court. I looked hard, his face was strong, expressionless, though a little sad. I did
n't feel like sitting there anymore, besides there was a lot of work to be done in office, so I quickly finished my lunch, got up from my seat, and I saw the man, keeping down the cellphone, staring at the plate in front of him. And
then there it was, I saw a tear form in the corner of his eye, about to drain, about to fall. Then he noticed me looking at him, he didn't know what I was thinking and I didn't know what he thought, but I did see his brain take over. He just blinked once. And it was was gone, disappearing right before my eyes. I'm still debating if it was a good thing or not. But I am happy that I didn't have to see a man cry.