July 27, 2005

Jurassic Park

I am sitting in the Jurrasic Park.

There is a Dinosaur in front of me, and it is eating away my time, my brains and my reputation. It has taken away everything that was important, leaving me with just memories of my past, and bright promises of the never to come tomorrow.

The problem with dinosaurs is that their size is huge and thier brains are too small to handle themselves. Everyone knows that. Then what am I doing sitting here. The answer to that question lies in the fact that my evil-eyed project manager (yes the same one I always bitch about ) doesn't know about it. Probably he bunked school, when they were teaching about dinosaurs. But the fact is that he doesn't know it. So as the biotechnologist assigned on this project, I am required to come out with some smart fixes in a few weeks to help the dinosaur perform better, which evolution couldn't bring about in the last few centuries.

Since I thought it was insanity, I killed the dinosaur, and went to my manager and told him that the client does not need this animal. What he needs in new DNA, a new animal, preferably a horse or a cheetah. He looked at me like I must be crazy. Then he gave a all knowing smile like the buddha gave when he got enlightened, and then we began another intellectual conversation about the possiblities of tweaking the dinosaurs DNA, so that it becomes 10% smaller in size and it's brain becomes 10% bigger. My part in the conversation was to watch his oratory skills. As my invaluable opinion was flushed down the toilet by the great man in the glass cabin, I have realized that the only way out of this mess, is either to resign or follow the Dilbert principle and stretch this project for so long that he retires and I become the project manager and then scrap the project. Or that I just hold it off for long enough for the client's executive board to make a few disasterous decisions which lead to the eventual bankruptcy of the company and the liquification of the assets. Only time will tell, which of them work out for me. But I am sure one of them will. Long live Blogger.

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